"Married Man Faces Dilemma: Should He Pursue Old Friend for Intimacy or Stay Loyal to Wife?"
A man from the United States is approaching his 40th wedding anniversary with his wife, a serial cheater who has been absent in their sex life for over 15 years. Despite her infidelity, he continues to prioritize their children and maintain a loving relationship with her. However, with both of them retired, the reality of their decades-long marriage hit him hard, leaving him craving intimacy.
He confided in a letter to Dear Abby, asking if it would be wrong for him to rekindle an old friendship that could potentially lead to more intimate relationships. He made it clear that he has no intention of leaving his wife but is desperate for human connection and physical intimacy.
Dear Abby advised the man to have an open conversation with his wife about his desires, suggesting that they discuss this issue with their gynecologist to better understand the root cause of her libido decline. If she refuses, he should be honest about his needs and expectations, which may reveal whether their relationship can be rekindled.
The columnist's advice also touched on a related question from another reader who has been eating dessert only three days a week as a compromise. Dear Abby suggested trying a ginger snap cookie to curb cravings or substituting it with fresh fruit for a healthier alternative.
In her response, Dear Abby emphasized the importance of honesty and open communication in relationships, even when faced with challenging issues like infidelity and declining libido. She encouraged readers to prioritize their emotional well-being and seek support from loved ones, professionals, or online resources whenever needed.
A man from the United States is approaching his 40th wedding anniversary with his wife, a serial cheater who has been absent in their sex life for over 15 years. Despite her infidelity, he continues to prioritize their children and maintain a loving relationship with her. However, with both of them retired, the reality of their decades-long marriage hit him hard, leaving him craving intimacy.
He confided in a letter to Dear Abby, asking if it would be wrong for him to rekindle an old friendship that could potentially lead to more intimate relationships. He made it clear that he has no intention of leaving his wife but is desperate for human connection and physical intimacy.
Dear Abby advised the man to have an open conversation with his wife about his desires, suggesting that they discuss this issue with their gynecologist to better understand the root cause of her libido decline. If she refuses, he should be honest about his needs and expectations, which may reveal whether their relationship can be rekindled.
The columnist's advice also touched on a related question from another reader who has been eating dessert only three days a week as a compromise. Dear Abby suggested trying a ginger snap cookie to curb cravings or substituting it with fresh fruit for a healthier alternative.
In her response, Dear Abby emphasized the importance of honesty and open communication in relationships, even when faced with challenging issues like infidelity and declining libido. She encouraged readers to prioritize their emotional well-being and seek support from loved ones, professionals, or online resources whenever needed.
another married man's struggles 
. but at the same time, I get why he wants to hold on to his marriage - family & all that. and what about his wife tho? is she even willing to work through her issues or is she just giving him a cold shoulder? 
. anyway, if you ask me, he should be talking to his therapist not his wife or gynecologist... gotta get to the root of the problem 
.
Back in my day, we just took our wives for granted, you know? We assumed they'd be there when we came home, and if they weren't... well, that's when the problems started. This guy's been married 15 years with a serial cheater, but he's still holding on because of the kids. I get it, family comes first, but come on, man! You need some love and attention too, you know? 
I mean, this guy's not asking for much – just some human connection and physical intimacy. Is that too much to ask?! 
That's just weird. Try the ginger snap cookie or eat some fruit, geez! 
So he's stuck in a 40-year marriage and his wife is basically sex-dead 
but they still got love for the kiddos... meanwhile, I checked the divorce rate stats in the US, it's around 32% (
) so not exactly a walk-in-the-park for him. Anyways, if he wants to rekindle that old friendship, he should be prepared for some major drama 
. According to an article on Psychology Today, about 70% of couples with infidelity issues are still together after 10 years (
.
. Communication is key in any relationship, especially when there are issues like infidelity and low libido. But I also feel for the guy - 40 years of marriage can be a long time, and I think it's normal to crave human connection and intimacy.
this is so sad - a guy who's been married for 40 years is feeling super lonely and disconnected from his wife because of her cheating ways... it's like he's stuck in a loveless marriage but doesn't want to leave his family behind 
dessert every 3 days? 
. I think it's time for him to have the tough conversation with his wife - but not because he wants to leave her, but because he deserves to feel seen and loved too 
. Maybe it's time for him to take care of himself first? Not sure if that means rekindling an old friendship or not, but I do think honesty is key 
...
And can we talk about how relatable this feels? I've been in relationships where the spark just isn't there anymore and it's like, okay, what do I even do? 
I'm all about honesty and being real with your partner... or friends 
. i do agree with dearabby tho, honesty is key in any relationship 
. why should he have to choose between his wife and his needs? they can work this out together or maybe even seek help from couples therapist or something 
. Maybe this is an opportunity for him to explore his own desires & needs, and figure out what he really wants from life... or at least have a more fulfilling marriage 
and honestly i think dear abby is right that open convo is key, but can't we just say that maybe the relationship needs a reboot not just a minor tweak? 
.
. I feel bad for him, though - retirement can be a lonely time, especially when you're not used to it anymore. 
. On the other hand, his wife has been a serial cheater 
. But if she refuses, he needs to be honest about his needs 
, who knows, maybe they can figure out a way to keep the spark alive together 
. And honestly, if he's gonna be honest with his wife about what he wants, she's got two options: either be understanding and work on it together or acknowledge that their marriage is over 
. Time for some real talk and maybe, just maybe, a divorce is what everyone needs