Dear Abby: My co-workers bully me for my baby face

A Quarter-Life Crisis: How to Outgrow the "Baby Face" Stigma in the Workplace

At 31, many people are still finding their footing in life – establishing careers, navigating relationships, and figuring out their identities. However, one woman's struggle is a bit more complicated. She looks younger than her age, often sparking confusion and condescension from those around her.

The problem isn't just about physical appearance; it's about being perceived as immature or inexperienced by adults who can't help but see you through the lens of youth. Colleagues might address her as "girl" instead of "woman," make incredulous faces when she reminisces about the 90s, or question her age with invasive inquiries about her driver's license.

Desperate to shed this image, our correspondent has tried various tactics: dressing more maturely, wearing makeup daily, and even bringing up her graduation year. Yet, these efforts only lead to ridicule or surprise from those who still can't get past her youthful appearance.

This phenomenon is often met with the patronizing advice of "You'll appreciate it when you're older." However, our correspondent emphasizes that she's not interested in waiting for maturity; she wants to be taken seriously now. As she so poignantly puts it, "Advice? I'm concerned with the present."

So what can this young woman do to overcome her predicament? One sage advisor suggests focusing on a steady career path and letting colleagues get to know her better. While this might take time, it's essential to stand up for oneself and stop letting hurtful comments get under your skin.

It's also worth recognizing that some people's reactions might be rooted in jealousy or close-mindedness. As our correspondent so eloquently states, "You know who you are, and that's what is most important."

In a different corner of the advice column, another reader struggles with a more toxic relationship issue: his wife's lack of respect and ridicule about his bladder control problems. Despite loving her, he's starting to feel resentful. As Dear Abby wisely notes, "Your wife's behavior indicates that not only does she not respect you, but she also has a cruel sense of humor and little love for you."

Ultimately, both of these women – the young professional struggling with her image and the man dealing with his wife's cruelty – deserve better. By taking control of their lives, standing up to those who belittle them, and focusing on their own growth, they can start to break free from the "baby face" stigma and find their place in the world.
 
omg yaaas i feel her!! 😂 like who cares about ur age or how old u look? its all about what u bring to the table 🤓 dont let ppl's opinions get to u just be u and focus on ur career or whatever ur passion is 💼🎉
 
🤷‍♀️ honestly i think its super frustrating when ppl cant take us for who we are rn. like lookin younger dont mean u r immature or inexperienced. its just a part of life, youll get old & wrinkly too 😂 but seriously, if ppl cant see beyond ur age, that says more about them than u. try not to change who u are 2 fit in w/ others, thats just pretendin 2 b someone u dont really are. focus on bein the best version of urself & ur age will catch up lol
 
I feel so bad for this young woman struggling with being taken seriously because of her age 😕. I mean, she's already 31, which is like, totally not a baby anymore! 🤦‍♀️ But I guess it's hard to shake off the "youthful" vibe that people still associate with that age range.

I think what really gets me is when people give her patronizing advice like "you'll appreciate it when you're older". Um, no thanks! 🙅‍♀️ She's already an adult with her own experiences and life to live. Instead of waiting for maturity, shouldn't we be encouraging her to take control of her career and relationships now? 💪

And let's not forget about that dude struggling with his wife's cruel jokes about his bladder control problems 🤣. That's some seriously hurtful stuff right there. I think it's time for him to have a serious talk with his partner (or see a therapist) instead of just enduring the ridicule. 💕
 
omg i feel her 🤕 this whole thing is just so frustrating. like she's already established her career and has life figured out but still gets treated like some kinda immature kid. it's not about her age or physical appearance, it's about people not taking you seriously because of how they see you at first glance.

and the worst part is when ppl give u "helpful" advice that's just patronizing and tells u to wait till u r older... no thanks 🙅‍♀️. she deserves better than that. i think what she needs is for ppl to get to know her as a person, not just her age or how she looks.

and btw, if someone's being cruel and hurtful just because they can't handle the fact that u r successful and confident... well, that's not ur problem 🤷‍♀️. stand up 4 urself and don't let it get 2 u. u deserve love and respect no matter what age u are 💖
 
🙄 People gotta stop making assumptions about others just 'cause they look young. Like, 31 is NOT baby age... 🤷‍♀️ You're still figuring stuff out, same as anyone else at any age. The key is not to try too hard, but to own it and show people you're more than just a pretty face 😎
 
I feel for this girl, you know? It's like, we've all been there where people still treat us like kids just because of our age... I'm 32 btw 😒. They don't get it, she's not trying to be cute or anything, she just wants respect and to be taken seriously in the workplace. And omg, that last paragraph about toxic relationships? Same, dude. It's all about taking control and setting boundaries with people who can't seem to treat you right. Maybe if people focused more on being supportive instead of condescending, we'd have a better world 🤷‍♀️.
 
I feel so bad for that young woman struggling with people's perceptions of her age 🤕. It's like she's stuck in a time loop where no matter what she does, people just can't help but see her as a "girl" instead of taking her seriously 💁‍♀️. But you know what? I think this is actually an opportunity for growth! She could focus on building those strong work relationships and showing everyone that she's got skills and experience 💼. And honestly, sometimes we just have to laugh off the ridiculous comments and move on 🎉. It's all about finding your tribe and supporting each other 💕.
 
idk why ppl r so worried about someone lookin like a kid in the workplace lol 🤷‍♀️ i mean what's the big deal? they're prob still figuring out who they are too just cuz they got a few more grey hairs dont make 'em all grown up 🙄
 
🤔 I feel like this is so relatable for a lot of people in our 30s... I mean, we're not old or anything, but at the same time, we're definitely not young kids anymore. It's like society is stuck in this weird cycle where you can't be too young, and you can't be too old.

I think it's super unfair that people are judged on their appearance, especially when they're trying to establish themselves in a career or show some maturity in relationships. Newsflash: just because someone looks younger than 31 doesn't mean they're not capable of handling responsibilities!

One thing I wish more people would do is try to see beyond physical appearance and actually get to know the person. Like, ask them about their interests, hobbies, or what they're passionate about! You'd be surprised how much you have in common with someone who's not just a pretty face.

Anyway, gotta say... those stories about the wife with bladder control issues are super messed up 🤢. I'm so sorry to hear that someone has to deal with that kind of disrespect and ridicule from their partner. Just thinking about it makes me angry 😡
 
I think it's kinda crazy how our society still perpetuates this whole "you're too young to be taken seriously" vibe 🤯. Like, what even is that? Newsflash: just because you look younger than your age doesn't mean you're not capable or mature enough to hold a job or have an opinion.

I think the key here is to stop trying so hard to conform to societal expectations and start embracing who you are, flaws and all 🌈. Instead of dressing more "maturely" or making an effort to hide your age, why not own it? Be proud of who you are and what you bring to the table.

And honestly, I think this whole "advice to wait until you're older" thing is just a cop-out 🙄. It's like, no thanks! I'd rather take control of my life now and deal with whatever comes my way than sit around waiting for some arbitrary age label to magically make me more credible.

It's also super interesting that the article touches on how some people's reactions might be rooted in jealousy or close-mindedness 🤷‍♀️. Like, if someone can't see past your youthful appearance and actually take you seriously, then they're probably the problem, not you.

Anyway, I think both of these women deserve way more respect than they're getting 💁‍♀️. By standing up for themselves and taking control of their lives, they can start to break free from this toxic narrative and find their own path. And honestly, that's something we should all be rooting for 🎉.
 
I'm all about embracing our quirks and not trying to fit into someone else's mold 🤪. I mean, what even is a "mature" look, right? It's so overrated. People should focus on being genuine and confident instead of trying to project this fake maturity that's just going to make them feel more anxious.

And can we talk about how ridiculous it is when people assume someone is immature because of their age or appearance? Like, what even is the criteria for being a "grown-up" anyway? It's not like there's some sort of magical number where you suddenly become responsible and mature. Newsflash: maturity comes from within, folks.

This whole "waiting to be older" thing just perpetuates this unhealthy narrative that our worth is tied to our age or experience level. No thanks. I want people to take me seriously now, not after they've finally figured out how to use TikTok 🤣.
 
🤷‍♀️ I think it's so wild that people still think youth = immaturity 🙄 Like, just because she looks young doesn't mean she's not a fully formed adult with her own thoughts and experiences. Newsflash: we're all still figuring stuff out at 31! 💁‍♀️ And can we pls get rid of the "girl" thing? It's so condescending 😒. She should totally be addressed as a grown woman, period. 💁‍♀️
 
🤷‍♀️ I totally feel for this woman trying to shake off her youthful vibe at work! It's like, she's an adult with a career and life of her own, but people still see her as just some young kid. 🙄 And don't even get me started on the whole "You'll appreciate it when you're older" thing... that's just condescending and dismissive.

I think what this woman needs to do is focus on building a strong sense of self-worth and confidence. Maybe take up a new hobby or interest that shows her passions and skills, so people can start seeing her as more than just her looks. 🎨 And yeah, it's also super important to set boundaries with people who are constantly belittling or condescending towards you.

It's interesting how these articles often highlight the toxic reactions from others... like, some people might be genuinely jealous of someone's youth and vitality 😒. But it's also possible that they're just close-minded or insecure themselves. Whatever the reason, it's never okay to treat someone with disrespect and ridicule.

For both women in these situations, I think the key is to take care of themselves and prioritize their own growth and happiness. 💖 Whether that means standing up to toxic people, finding a supportive community, or just taking some time for self-care... whatever works for them! 🌸
 
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