The rise of 'low contact' family relationships: 'I said, Mum, I need to take some space'

For Marie, setting boundaries in her relationship with her mother was a matter of survival. The stress of their interactions had become overwhelming, triggered by what she describes as "rejection, shaming and feeling like the 'black sheep of the family'." A lifetime of being made to feel inferior had taken its toll, but it wasn't until her own diagnosis of autism that Marie realized she needed to take control. The decision was not to cut ties completely, but rather to establish a new dynamic - what's known as "low contact" or LC.

This approach avoids the absolute cutting all ties associated with no contact and instead offers a more nuanced way forward. For Marie, this means limiting interactions to specific situations where she has a clear purpose, such as checking in on her grandmother or sharing news that requires attention. When she does call, it's with precision and intentionality, aiming to avoid getting drawn into arguments or emotional entanglements.

While some may argue that LC is too soft, others see it as an essential step towards healing and maintaining mental health. As Katherine Cavallo, a family psychotherapist points out, the concept of LC can be incredibly empowering for those who feel suffocated by toxic relationships. By setting boundaries and establishing a sense of control, individuals can reclaim their emotional autonomy.

The rise of social media has contributed to the notion that families should always be "present" on screen. The pressure to present an idyllic family image has led some to turn away from traditional family dynamics altogether. For those who have chosen LC as an alternative, it's not necessarily a rejection of family ties but rather a recognition that emotional boundaries are crucial for well-being.

Marie's experience highlights the importance of self-awareness and support in navigating such situations. With therapy and trusted relationships becoming her priority, Marie has been able to recognize triggers within herself that needed attention - rather than trying to change her mother. The distinction is subtle but significant: healing begins with understanding oneself before attempting to fix others.

Ultimately, LC can be a delicate balance between giving space and keeping connections alive. It requires a willingness to adapt and explore what's possible within the limits of one's emotional capacity. As Caroline notes, maintaining boundaries doesn't mean abandoning relationships; it means learning to prioritize what truly matters - a vital life skill for anyone navigating complex family dynamics.

While LC may not be suitable or desirable for everyone, its emergence serves as a reminder that mental health and wellness should always take precedence in our personal lives. By embracing this concept and forging new paths forward, individuals can reclaim their agency and create more sustainable relationships built on mutual respect and understanding.
 
🤗 i totally feel like we're living in a time where people are finally starting to understand that setting boundaries is NOT weak, it's actually super empowering 💪! for so long, we've been conditioned to prioritize others' feelings over our own, but now there's this growing movement of people recognizing the importance of self-care and emotional autonomy 🌱. lc is more than just a way to avoid family drama - it's about taking control of your own healing and prioritizing what truly matters 💕. and let's be real, social media has played a huge role in making us feel like we need to have it all together all the time 📸. but honestly, nobody is perfect and that's okay 🙅‍♀️.
 
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